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Celina's avatar

OMG! What a read!! Growing up having an eating disorder for a long time during my primary school days to university i felt that i always had a negative relationship with food in general. I felt very early i was looking towards what was being shown on the television as screen time was all i had being raised from a single mother so, she was juggling with two kids and trying her best to keep everything under controlled. I remembered at the age of 6 i would always go to the salad bar instead of having a substantial proper meal for lunch since no one was there to monitor my food intake. Which led into high school where it became a habit of either skipping lunch or counting my calories to make me feel a bit better about myself.

In university, was when i got away with a lot just by over scheduling myself with classes and never wanting to go home because home = having to eat a meal. So i would make my schedule as full as i can make it either with classes or taking up a part time job just so i can avoid eating. Realizing later that i needed to get help with my eating where i stayed in a inpatient treatment centre for four months just trying to understand where my fear in eating stems from to better understand what food i like eating to the foods i don't.

Today, i feel like I have a better grasp on what food i enjoy eating versus foods that i strongly will avoid or in better words that i fear of eating. Although, i am not completely "recovered" from my eating disorder as there will be easier days than others. i can say for now it's still a working progress but i know it will be okay :)

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Muchtar's avatar

This is very late, but I love this so much. I always grew up feeling like I always had too much on my plate, and it was a source of shame. While there's much for me to do to eat healthier than I currently am, I'm happy with the progress I've made.

Also, I love that you listen to Ricky Montgomery.

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